12. When the sun begins to shine/I hear a song from another time/And'll fade away

[voluntaryapnea]

Are you there, Yoda? It's me, Stiles Stilinski. [It would be so cool if Yoda actually answers. But he's mostly joking.] Seriously though. What's going on in your pocket of the universe? Universes? Whatever.

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Private

[surfaceshine]

[Dean - this Dean - will never forget the fact that it was dumb, stupid, plain, random luck that he got the Admiral instead of a red-eyed demon at that crossroads; that he was given a chance not only to save his brother, but to save his world. That he was given a chance to know the people he knew, to meet Felix, to get to have him now; that he never became the man Stiles has to figure out how to help, now.

Dean knows himself. He knows it won't be easy, wonders for just a moment if it will even be possible. The hunter opens his mouth to tell him that and abruptly, just that quickly, he knows what his answer has to be. He looks back at the screen, gaze steady and serious. He's not proud of this, not by a long shot, but he's sure of it.]

You'll never convince him to help himself. Ever. It's gotta be someone else. [It's gotta be Sam, he doesn't say, because in a way he already has; because he's not so sure it can only be Sam. Dean only knows that it can't be himself. Even the version of himself talking, now, to Stiles was never motivated to save himself if failing to do so would save someone else. If doing so meant he would have to live alone.

That, and this: he nods, then, and breaks the dour mood with a slow, crooked smile.]

You'll figure it out.

Private

[voluntaryapnea]

[He nods at his words. You'll never convince him to help himself. Ever. If Stiles has a type for friends? That is exactly the type he's drawn to. Scott, Allison, Lydia. Bucky, Steve, Peter Parker. Dean. There is a definite pattern of self-sacrificing here that is somehow heartening and depressing at the same time.

He smiles when Dean does. It's still so much of a relief to see that he's okay, that Sam is okay, that the Barge works. It'll be something he can hold onto when things get rough. And he has no doubts that they're going to get rough. With Dean, with others on the ship, with the floods. With the deathtoll. No one ever said the path of redemption would be an easy one to walk.]

You take care of each other. [He doesn't need to say it because he knows that's exactly Dean's intent.] And next time, I definitely want to meet this Starfleet boyfriend. [He grins.]

Private

[surfaceshine]

[Things will get rough, because they must get rougher to get better; Dean doesn't exactly believe this, but he believes in the sense of it. He believes why people say it: it's a way to get them through, to tell themselves it's all worth it. The truth is that sometimes it isn't worth it.

But sometimes it is. Dean's slow smile bursts back to full wattage at Stiles' words, not the least because finally there's another person that can appreciate that statement. Felix never really gets it when Dean geeks out over anything that is now commonplace for him, because he didn't grow up with Star Trek; now the hunter grins because effing Starfleet is awesome, almost as awesome as the man Stiles is unknowingly referring to now.]

God, right? I'll see if I can get him to take a few minutes off from helping run the goddamn Enterprise to talk. You'll love him. Entire repertoire of eyerolls. [Felix was around here somewhere, he knows, but he knows how the Barge works; Dean will get to talk to him at will, but his end of the connection may already have cut for the day.

And that just leaves Sam. The hunter wrinkles his nose.] "Each other?" I'm the big brother here. I do the taking care, he does the research and stays the hell outta the way.

[Dean missed him so much, like a lung or an arm, and now he razzes on him with the kind of assumed, profound fondness that only family that is also one another's best friend can claim. That doesn't mean he doesn't have room for other friends, though:] I meant it. You'll figure it out. Okay? If I had to be tied to someone, I'd be okay with it being you.

Private

[voluntaryapnea]

[Stiles definitely believes it. Things get rough. Then they get rougher. What if it's agony now and just hell later on? he'd asked Morrell. She'd told him to just keep going. It's what he's been doing ever since. Things have kept getting worse and not better since then, but he's still wading through the treacherous waters. He isn't going to stop, even if ultimately it isn't worth it personally. He has to keep going because of his friends. Because of his dad. Because of Dean.

He watches Dean's expression change back to a bright smile once more and he can't help but grin back at him.]

Dude. The Enterprise. [He laughs at the mention of repertoire of eyerolls. Yeah, that definitely sounds like someone he can get along with pretty well. He smirks at Dean's comment about being the big brother. It reminds him of Bucky's protectiveness of Steve. Of his own protectiveness of Scott. He's willing to bet, though, that Sam is about as protective of Dean as Steve is of Bucky and Scott is of Stiles. It's just how these relationships tend to work.]

Yeah, I will. And thanks for the vote of confidence. It helps.

Private

[surfaceshine]

[It's the best Dean can do, to believe in someone completely from across the universe and time; it is also, luckily, his specialty. It's easy for him, who would and does spurn religion in any form but is still capable of blind faith strong enough to stand on when it becomes necessary. It's how he survived the Barge, and dragged several people with him who otherwise might not have found their footing on their own.

Some make it easier than others. Stiles is one of them. Dean still isn't certain how he would feel if it were actually him, but it isn't, so he can overlook that; and he wasn't lying: he's okay with it being Stiles. He likes to think he would be. The hunter's grin goes lopsided, fond. He'd ruffle the kid's hair, punch him in the shoulder, something if they were standing in front of each other, but as it is:]

Hang in there. And good luck. You're gonna need that, too.