24. We're falling apart and we're coming together again and again.

[voluntaryapnea]

[Open Action Spam]

[After leaving Scott's room, Stiles makes his way toward the stairs. He's relieved as hell that Scott is awake again, that he seems to be fine. Just as nearly everyone had told him. But now he has other people he needs to check on. Lydia, Dean, Kira, Liam, Allison, Isaac, Bucky, Steve, Jean. His people. They're growing in numbers, expanding a little bit at a time. For a guy who'd once thought himself virtually incapable of caring about anyone besides his dad, Scott, and Lydia, he's come a long way.

He heads for Dean's room first, mostly because they'd been in the midst of a battle with a horrifyingly large kaiju before getting pulled back to the Barge, and he wants to make sure his inmate is okay. He still feels a little disoriented by all of it. More so than most of these kinds of events tend to leave him.

He can be found heading toward any of their rooms, also at the cafeteria to grab something to eat, and then heading back to his own room on the seventh floor.]

[Private to Scott]

[He's slept a bit since he saw Scott earlier, but he still looks a little tired. He also looks a little nervous.]

I have a question.

[Spam for Lydia]

[Everything is already set up in the enclosure, ready to go. Now he just has to get her to go with him. He's chewing his thumbnail as he heads toward her room, and knocks lightly on the door. It's late but not super late. Not late enough that he's worried she'll be asleep. He stands and waits, heart beating quickly in his chest.]

Comments

[voluntaryapnea]

[That is a perfect way to thank him. He's pretty sure that's actually the best thanks ever. He kisses her back, lifting a hand and letting it wind into her hair. He shifts closer because it's cold even if it's manufactured cold. His other arm winds around her waist.

After a moment he pulls away to look at her, holding his breath as he searches her eyes.]

Lydia, there's...something I need to say to you and I'm kinda...not sure how you're going to take it.

[His voice is quiet.]

[lydiascreams]

[She's not entirely sure what to do with that, at first. Considering the way he's worded it, she's fairly sure it's not something he considers good. And, considering all this, she knows he's not about to tell her anything bad about their relationship. He looks positively nervous, which helps her narrow it down to one, possible thing.

And of course she's already figured it out. They've been officially dating for almost two months now and-- every time things go a little further, he looks uncomfortable and stops her. She's not at all surprised he's a virgin, and it doesn't bother her. She doesn't get why he wants to talk about it right now but she's been waiting for him to bring it up, so he feels more confident and comfortable and not like she's pushing him. Even though she wants to push him because-- it's been a long time and, well not the point.

The point right now is helping him feel confident and comfortable. Her stomach clenches a little and maybe she suddenly looks a little nervous, too. For different reasons, yes, but this is kinda new for her, too. In a way.

She nods at him, then takes a deep breath.]

There's something I wanna say to you, too. Can I go first? [Because she's been meaning to tell him for a while, except-- they're always in some kind of emotional situation because of outside elements. Either her ex-boyfriend leaving the Barge, or floods, or his best friend being unconscious on the bed next to them. She keeps wanting to find a moment where it's just about them and this fits that description perfectly.]

[voluntaryapnea]

[He considers it good. He's just not entirely sure she'll consider it good. He hopes so. He hasn't allowed himself to dwell on the possibility that she won't consider it good. If he thinks about it for long, he's pretty sure he'll have a gigantic panic attack.

He's been wanting to say it for weeks now. Longer, really. Since before all of the Nogitsune crap, but they'd only been good friends then and he wasn't going to push for anything else no matter how much he wanted things to be different. Having Lydia in his life in any way was better than not having her in his life at all.

He swallows hard and then nods when she asks if she can tell him something first. He's nervous, and he has to take a deep breath so he doesn't wind up losing his nerve.]

Yeah, of course.

[lydiascreams]

[She smiles at that. And then she takes a deep breath and nods a little. It's a nervous smile, but it's a sincere one. She pulls her hands from around his neck and cups his face again as she holds his gaze. Her heart is beating fast, but he's not a werewolf, so hopefully he can't tell exactly how nervous she is all of the sudden..]

Stiles. [She pauses for a second. Because she's also been wanting to say it for weeks now. But now that she's actually doing it, it feels like such a huge thing. Which it is. But she's confident on how she feels and that she means it, she knows she owes it to both of them to do this, to be open to him about it. Because she thinks it'll make him happy, too.]

I love you. [Her voice is surprisingly calm as she says it, and she takes a deep breath.]

I've been meaning to tell you for a while now, but I wanted it to be right. [She glances around for a second then smiles more at him.] And you made it right.

[voluntaryapnea]

[He searches her eyes when she says his name, and the breath catches in his throat when she tells him she loves him. His eyes widen a little and he stares at her for a long moment before a smile threatens to split his face in half.]

Oh. [That...isn't at all what he'd been expecting, but it makes this so much easier.]

Lydia, I love you too.

[lydiascreams]

[She knows he does. And it's not an ego thing, or even the way he acts around her. She just feels it. Still, hearing him say the words while he looks at her like that-- no one's ever actually said the words to her before. After everything they've been through, still are going through to get here -- it means a lot more than she could tell him.

So she nods slightly back at him as her eyes tear up. Smiling too, she just leans closer and kisses him again.]

[voluntaryapnea]

[He reaches out and cups her face in his hands, kissing her softly once more. She loves him. He can hardly believe it, even if he feels it, too. He shifts closer to her, leaning his forehead against hers when the kiss ends.

He gently thumbs away a tear from beneath her eye, his own bright.]

[lydiascreams]

[She leans into his touch, biting down on her bottom lip as she smiles softly at him. After a second, she bumps her nose against his lightly as she pulls her arms from around his neck, to wrap around his waist, underneath his over shirt. Her hands are getting cold. And this way they can both be closer and benefit from the warmth.

Their comfortable silence stretches just for a moment longer before she clears her throat and nods at him.]

Your turn.

[voluntaryapnea]

Oh.

[He laughs, but it's soft. Hushed. Like he's afraid he'll ruin the moment if he's too loud. He rests his forehead against hers.]

That's...actually what I was going to tell you. I was kinda waiting for the right moment, too.

[lydiascreams]

Oh.

[Not at all what she was expecting, apparently, but it helps her relax. She smiles at him and although she almost mentions that she thought he was going for something else, she figures there's no point in making him uncomfortable now. Not when he looks so happy.

She runs her hands over his back as she presses a little closer and grins softly.]

I'd apologize for taking it from you and saying it first, but I'm really not sorry at all.

[voluntaryapnea]

[He can't help but wonder what she was expecting. He wants to ask, but right now, he just wants to enjoy the evening with her more. He leans in and presses a kiss to her cheek.]

Me either. I'm not sorry at all, I mean.

[He grins and reaches out to take her hand in his, linking their fingers together.]

Come on. Let's skate.

[lydiascreams]

Wait.

[She squeezes his hand and tugs on it gently, then grabs a gift from inside the bag she brought with her. It's not big, rectangular shaped, and wrapped in blue, of course.]

Don't you want your gift first? [She grins softly.]

It's not much, obviously. Considering our inability to go shopping. [It's one of the few things she dislikes about being on the barge.]

But it's-- fitting.

[voluntaryapnea]

Oh.

[He's surprised. He honestly hadn't been expecting any kind of gift from her. Like she said, getting things for people on the Barge was difficult at best. He arches his eyebrows, though, looking curiously at the box before reaching out to take it.]

Yeah, I definitely want my gift.

[lydiascreams]

[She grins softly at him, then leans closer and kisses his cheek before letting go of his hand.]

Go ahead, open it. [It was an accidental find, really. She was going through her closet and just happened to come across a box she didn't even remember was there. And then she found-- that. All she had to do was frame it, along with the envelope, and wrap it.]

[voluntaryapnea]

[He smiles back at her and carefully opens the package, eyebrows furrowing as he sees her name printed on an envelope in childlike handwriting. It takes him a second to recognize that it's his from a long time ago.

Stiles looks at her curiously before turning the frame over. A soft laugh escapes him at the sight of the red construction paper, neatly folded. The rest of the card is much less neat, white and silver glitter all over the place along with hand drawn hearts.]

Oh, wow. That's -- wow. [He's pretty sure his cheeks have turned red and he shakes his head a little, amused.]

[lydiascreams]

[She laughs softly at the look on his face, then shakes her head as she takes a step closer to him.]

I don't know if this was third or fourth grade, but I found it in my closet.

[She lifts a hand to brush her thumb over his bright red cheek.]

Thank you for appreciating my hair, Stiles. My mom would be glad to hear someone does.

[voluntaryapnea]

It was fourth grade.

[He hadn't made anyone a Valentine's Day card in third grade. Not even Scott. It had been too soon after his mom.]

Wow, I really...used a lot of glitter. [He chuckles at her comment and looks down at her, leaning over and pressing a kiss to her forehead.] Well. It is very pretty hair.

[lydiascreams]

[She leans against his side a little and nods, twirling her hair around her finger.]

Thank you. [She reluctantly pulls away from him and picks up a pair of skates then sits down on one of the chairs to put them on.]

I'm sure there are more from you in there, I'll just have to look for it. If I remember correctly, you didn't really sign all of your cards, but I knew they were from you.

[voluntaryapnea]

[He watches her for a moment, then moves over and picks up the other pair of skates to do the same. He carefully sets down the framed card and envelope. He smiles wryly at her comment, though.]

Somehow I'm not all that surprised you knew.

[lydiascreams]

You weren't exactly subtle, Stiles.

[Once her skates are on, she turns to look at him as she waits for him to be done. There's a hint of adoringness to her smile.]

I remember once, I think it was on my birthday? You went to leave a card on my desk, I wasn't in class but I was coming back. And you just stumbled your way back to your seat and almost took a couple of chairs with you. I saw it, but I never said anything.

[voluntaryapnea]

[He huffs out a laugh in the cold air, cheeks turning pink again.]

Yeah I guess subtlety's never been one of my strong suits.

[He laces up his skates and rises to his feet. He doesn't really remember that particular incident, but it definitely sounds like him and he's not surprised.]

Did I end up leaving the card?

[lydiascreams]

You did. And you kept looking over at me while I was opening it.

[She gets up, too, then holds out her hand to him as they start toward the frozen lake. She's never seen it frozen like this before, but it's nice, peaceful.]

Where did you learn to skate? [Because she does remember thinking he was pretty good at it. Almost graceful, which had been a surprise to her back then.]

[voluntaryapnea]

[Stiles reaches out and takes hold of her hand when she offers it, skating with her out onto the lake easily. He smiles a little at the question.]

My mom loved to skate. She took me a lot when I was little. I guess it's one of those things you don't forget how to do.

[lydiascreams]

Oh.

[She's glad he's smiling when he talks about his mom. She wouldn't want him to get upset with the subject.]

I probably saw you at the skating rink at some point, then. I was there a lot, too. Even when I didn't have classes. Did you like going?

[voluntaryapnea]

Yeah. Yeah, I did. It was sort of a thing that we did when my dad was working. He's not much for ice skating. He might still be better at it than Scott, though.

[He laughs softly.]