[The answer just makes Dean feel tired; he knows he should push back against it, repeat the arguments he's already tried, find the way to word it so that Stiles will listen and go home, so he won't repeat Dean's mistakes. So he won't continue letting things like that place and the dreams and the Joker's gas happen to him because he thinks it will be worth it in the end.
So he won't save everyone he's trying to save only to kill them again one, five, ten years from now when all this comes to a head. Dean is dead certain he is right. The apocalypse is the one constant left in his life and it scorches anything that dares to try to survive it.
His gut twists, either in empathy or with whatever unnatural malaise has gripped hold of it, and he swallows carefully, as carefully does not move. This is when he realizes he doesn't have to do any of that: it's the coward's way out, but Dean has known almost as long as he's known the word for it that he is definitely a coward. He does not open his eyes.]
no subject
[The answer just makes Dean feel tired; he knows he should push back against it, repeat the arguments he's already tried, find the way to word it so that Stiles will listen and go home, so he won't repeat Dean's mistakes. So he won't continue letting things like that place and the dreams and the Joker's gas happen to him because he thinks it will be worth it in the end.
So he won't save everyone he's trying to save only to kill them again one, five, ten years from now when all this comes to a head. Dean is dead certain he is right. The apocalypse is the one constant left in his life and it scorches anything that dares to try to survive it.
His gut twists, either in empathy or with whatever unnatural malaise has gripped hold of it, and he swallows carefully, as carefully does not move. This is when he realizes he doesn't have to do any of that: it's the coward's way out, but Dean has known almost as long as he's known the word for it that he is definitely a coward. He does not open his eyes.]
I need to not be conscious.