[She has her ideas of how she imagines he wants her to live differently, but she wants him to spell it out for her. To make perfectly clear how she could have changed her life, since he knows so much.]
[To tell the truth, she doesn't believe she could have made different decisions and survived as well as she did. She so strongly sought a purpose, she so desperately needed a guide, and when presented with one in the form of the Order, she absolutely couldn't say no.]
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[She has her ideas of how she imagines he wants her to live differently, but she wants him to spell it out for her. To make perfectly clear how she could have changed her life, since he knows so much.]
[To tell the truth, she doesn't believe she could have made different decisions and survived as well as she did. She so strongly sought a purpose, she so desperately needed a guide, and when presented with one in the form of the Order, she absolutely couldn't say no.]